


Halo

by Pancake22



Category: Deadpool (Comics), Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man (Comicverse), Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man/Deadpool - Joe Kelly (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, CEO Peter Parker, Enemies to Lovers, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Identity Porn, Identity Reveal, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-07
Updated: 2021-02-07
Packaged: 2021-03-12 01:41:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,184
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29252406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pancake22/pseuds/Pancake22
Summary: Convinced that Spider-Man is hiding in plain sight as an employee at Parker Industries, Deadpool explores the building in hopes of spotting his friend amongst the sea of corporate drones.  All to offer him a job opportunity, of course.  That was it though.  Honest.
Relationships: Peter Parker/Wade Wilson, Spider-Man/Deadpool
Comments: 14
Kudos: 244





	Halo

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by the events from Spider-Man/Deadpool #1 (some dialogue taken directly from it).

A flash of purple light illuminated the afternoon sky, leaving a rift of some sort in its wake.

From the streets below, city dwellers watched on in awe as two figures emerged from the portal. Mothers clutched protectively at their children who smiled up at the spectacle, comforted by the fact that their beloved superheroes were safe from danger once again.

Even complete strangers took a minute out of their busy day to reach out to those around them, exchanging ideas about what type of apocalyptic event they were just spared thanks to these brave souls.

“A job interview!? Are you serious right now?" Spider-Man yelled, slightly hysterical as he swung through the air with Deadpool in tow.

“Yes! So congratulations, ya got the job! I’d shake your hand but-”

"Never! Not in any reality! Not in any universe would I work for you!”

“We have great dental?”

Once they had safely landed on the nearest rooftop – Spider-Man placing Deadpool down somewhat inelegantly in his outrage – the hero fixed the merc with one of his signature glares. 

“So let me get this straight,” he stated slowly. “You teleported us both to a demon dimension to see whether I was qualified to be your ‘business partner’?” 

“Well, when you put it like that…” Deadpool shrugged sheepishly. “Yes?”

The webslinger let out an emphatic groan and headed towards the ledge.

“Webs, look, I know you’re more than capable of the job, but I still have to ensure a fair selection process amongst all my candidates!" He trailed after his friend, who showed no signs of either stopping or responding. “And the last thing I want is to be accused of favoritism!” He winced as the excuse fell flat to his own ears. "Also, it probably sucks working for that tool Peter Parker so….”

Spandexed feet were suddenly screeching to a halt.

_Bingo._

“What do you mean by ‘tool’?” The wall-crawler asked darkly as he turned, arms crossed.

“Hey, I’m not judging you," Deadpool reassured, sauntering towards the hero. "We’ve all done things we’re ashamed of for a buck. There was this one time, I was even willing to let this guy–”

“First of all,” Spider-Man interrupted, knowing full well how the man had a penchant for oversharing. “Peter Parker is trying his best to make the world a better place. Second, he– Oh god, I’m missing a meeting!”

He glanced down frantically at the Webware around his wrist.

“Ya see? At _Deadpool is the Greatest Incorporated_ , no meetings! You set the hours! You take the jobs you want! It’s totally like Uber with super-powers, and P.S. we don’t run background checks either!” The merc declared, channeling all the enthusiasm of a used car salesman on late night TV, topped off with a two thumbs up and everything.

Ignoring him, the webslinger tapped his ear to answer an incoming call, only to flinch violently at the sound of a tinny shouting voice.

“Are they…” the hero sighed. “That pissed huh?...I know, but there was this fight with Electro and…! No, but I can’t stop being Spider-Man either…”

Five seconds in and this exchange already had Wade clenching his fists, ready to clock the guy on the other line. Was this asshole actually trying to make Webs hang up the suit?

The merc cupped his hands around his mouth. “Alrighty, bye-bye Mister Commandant Parker, sir! Spidey has to go!” 

Well, who _else_ could it have been aside from his douchebag boss? 

“Come on, Wade,” Spidey pleaded. “I said no. I’m seriously not in the mood.” He had already ended the call and stood slumped over, hands scrubbing across his masked face.

Wade softened only momentarily at his friend’s distress before carrying on with his business pitch, which seemed more important than ever after what he’d just witnessed. _Someone_ had to save Webs from the cruelties of the corporate world!

“Look Spidey, I know I don’t have the best track record, being a former hitman and all, but I’m trying to change. Maybe if you ditch your company and come with me, we can work together on ‘good guy’ missions. It pays pretty well…probably not as well as your current job, but I guarantee you’d be happier as my spide-kick than as Parker’s coffee getter!”

The webslinger shook his head in disbelief before advancing towards the building ledge once more.

“No! Spidey, would you just _wait_ for one second? _Please_ ,” Deadpool begged.

With a sigh, the younger man stopped to give Wade his full attention.

"The truth is, I thought if I hung out with you, doing the right thing, I could earn that hero title…and maybe your respect, too." He began wringing his hands. "Could you... ever see that happening? Or is that just wishful thinking on my part?”

Spider-Man simply stood there, unsure of how to handle the merc’s unexpected display of vulnerability. It was something of a rarity in their encounters. 

He opened his mouth to respond when the earpiece crackled to life again, this time bombarding him with expletives.

“Augh! I’m sorry, Wade. I really gotta go.” As Spider-Man turned to face the adjacent building, crouched low on the lip of the rooftop, Deadpool noticed a hesitation to his movements. But all he could do was wait there anxiously, his heart in his throat.

“Good luck on your business venture," was all the hero said before he swung away.

Left alone to deal with his frustrations, Deadpool racked his brain for ideas. If Spidey would just give him a chance, he’d see that Wade was serious about changing for the better. How could he though when all of his focus was directed towards being Parker’s errand boy, tending to his every need? It made an odd picture, for sure. Him sitting in on meetings wearing his colorful, skin-tight costume while a bunch of hoity-toity businessman pointed to a chart and discussed metrics.

The visual drew out a snort from the merc. 

His amusement died down, however, once a thought crossed his mind.

No, that couldn’t be right. The man went through great lengths to preserve his secret identity. 

But what if…

The merc tapped his chin in contemplation.

What if…Webs didn't wear his Spidey suit while he was in the office? What if he was dressed as a regular worker? It wasn’t too far-fetched since he even confessed once that Parker knew his identity, and if _that_ didn’t make Deadpool bristle with rage and envy…

Sure, he was Parker’s bodyguard first and foremost, but hadn't Spidey also mentioned that he helped develop some of their tech? Was Wade just going to assume he was doing labwork in his spandex the entire time? Talk about uncomfortable! Who could wear their superhero uniform for both their day _and_ night job?

Okay, Deadpool did, but that was out of necessity. It was for everyone’s benefit really.

If Spidey was stuck in the office all day, maybe Wade could save him the trouble and visit him there. As for how he would be able to identify him...well, somewhere along the line, Deadpool had convinced himself that this mission would be less of a brainy thing and more of a gut thing. And he was good with guts. 

If he could find Spidey on instinct alone, maybe then, the hero would finally realize the two of them had something special going on. That they truly belonged together.

As uh, business partners of course.

So without another thought, the merc devoted all of his energy towards gaining access to the Baxter Building, and lucky for him, the phrase “high-level security” meant absolutely nothing in a universe where infiltration was always a key plot element.

After successfully bypassing their “security”, the merc explored the facility to his heart’s content, playing a game he liked to call Spot the Spidey. He meandered through the halls, poking his head into any cubicle, breakroom, and conference room he came across, eyes scanning over every occupant. 

One would assume he’d spend just a bit more time scrutinizing (analyzing body type, mannerisms, and so on) but he’d somehow gotten this ridiculous idea into his head that the second his eyes landed on Spidey, a halo of light would surround his body or some shit like that. 

Webs was just so unique and otherworldly. Deadpool could see it in the way he gracefully flew across the sky - ethereal and weightless - like he belonged up there. No doubt he would appear entirely out of place confined to a desk, dressed in a button-up and tie, doing Monday morning crossword puzzles.

Fast-forward to his third day of playing this game, however, Deadpool was beginning to have doubts. Doubts about his theory. Doubts about his intuition. Doubts about Spidey readily accepting him even if he was right about everything else. Just doubts all around.

Yet he soldiered on.

So by late Friday afternoon Deadpool could be found combing through the marketing department. With the excitement he felt at the start of this quest now gone, the merc took to singing under his breath as means of entertainment. Anything to spice up the humdrum of office life. Good god.

“Working 9 to 5, what a way to make a livin’,  
Barely getting by, it's all takin’ and no givin’.”

Fortunately, this section had an open office layout, which meant none of those pesky cubicle walls to obstruct his view. However, a brief scan through revealed no Spidey here either. With a heavy sigh, he decided to head to another floor.

"Want to move ahead but the boss won't seem to let me,  
I swear sometimes that man is out to get mEEEEEEE!!!"

His last note ended in a squeal and a leap backwards as he turned around to find a pair of expectant brown eyes mere inches from his face.

“Parker!” Deadpool clutched his chest. “As I live and breathe! What are you doing here, bud?”

“What am I doing in the office building of the company that I own?” the CEO asked incredulously.

“Oh…wait…you…you own this company?” the merc asked, pointing to the ground and making a show of looking around wide-eyed.

Parker sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose before reaching a decision on something. He grabbed Wade’s arm and pulled him with a surprising amount of force towards the elevator. 

Wade suspected he was getting kicked out until the younger man pressed the button for the top floor. 

“Let’s take this to my office,” he said, answering Wade’s internal question.

Parker’s office was fit for a CEO, alright. It was quite roomy. Three of the walls were entirely made up of windows, which gave the illusion of an even larger space, like all of New York City was his office. The view was as good as you could get without actually being on top of the building, which he doubted Parker would be interested in. Just the thought of standing at the edge of the rooftop would undoubtedly make that boy tremble in his Armani suit. 

“So…” Parker drawled, “Care to explain why you’re here?” He went to stand behind his desk.

Deadpool was getting some serious porno vibes from this scenario, and if this wasn’t Spidey’s asshat boss he was talking to now, he’d probably be into it. Well, he was kinda into it already. The guy was a bit of a looker, objectively speaking, if that made any sense.

“Seriously,” the businessman spoke again. “Why are you snooping around my building and harassing my employees? Did someone hire you to acquire intel on our latest tech or something?”

“What? Noooo!” The merc objected, flailing wildly.

Parker crossed his arms.

“I just…needed to know more about this place. What’s got Spidey creamin’ himself about working here?”

“So…this is because of Spider-Man?” Oddly enough, this news had Parker managing to look more tense than before.

“I don’t know what you have over Spidey. Blackmail? Maybe some favor you did for him once and now he feels obligated to repay you, being the good-hearted person he is-”

“Look, Wade-“

“It’s Deadpool to you,” he snapped.

“Deadpool,” he corrected, “I’m not forcing him to do anything. No blackmail. And he doesn’t feel like he owes _me_. The employees of the company, maybe….but definitely not me.”

“Even if that’s the case, that doesn’t mean you have to treat him the way you do. I see how you yank him around. Just earlier this week, I overheard your call with him-” 

Parker furrowed his eyebrows. “Sorry, I called him when?”

“A few days ago. Monday actually. He was all torn up about missing a meeting.”

The CEO blinked.

Wade continued, “It was right after I teleported us both to hell-“

Recognition flashed across his face, “Ohhhhh…” He took a few seconds to consider something. “Oh, right. Yes. Yes, I was the one called him.”

“My point is you’re making his life miserable. He doesn’t belong here in some corporation where everyone, including him, is treated like a number. I don’t think you realize how special he is.”

The merc could see he was getting through to the man, who finally looked down with tired eyes. “Look, Wa-…Deadpool, this job...it’s something he _promised_ to do. Believe me when I say that I wish he could be free of this obligation and do whatever he wanted, but…my hands are tied,” he finished, voice strained. 

Deadpool fixed him with a cold look, his voice low and dangerous now. “I fucking hate that cop-out phrase.” He shook his head to himself. “You better do everything in your power to take care of him. If I find out you’re lying or that you’re hiding something that could hurt him…or anyone in this company for that matter, you’re fucking done.”

“Of course, Deadpool.” Parker actually had the nerve to offer Wade a small smile.

The merc narrowed his eyes in scrutiny. That was _not_ the reaction he was going for. Either this man had nothing to hide or he was _very_ good at it. 

“Until then…” Wade dismissed, making his way towards the door.

The CEO nodded and busied himself with straightening up the reports scattered across his desk.

It felt like there was an important part of this conversation Wade was missing. Everything Parker said was just so damn cryptic, but he resigned himself to mulling it over later tonight, preferably with a lot more alcohol in his system. It'd been a long week.

Deadpool had the doorknob at mid-turn when something off to the side caught his attention. A pop of color, noticeable amidst the drab, gray office decor. Glancing over, he spotted a familiar suit peeking out of a backpack haphazardly stuffed behind a tall plant.

Aha!

So maybe Webs actually was here in “disguise.” His excitement, however, was immediately overshadowed by the circumstances of this discovery.

There were a number of reasons why Webs could have chosen to leave his belongings with his boss, but Wade, in his line of work, was accustomed to dealing with the most twisted, deplorable minds that humanity had to offer. So call it force of habit when he automatically assumed the worst.

He had a feeling something was going on between these two that surpassed a strictly professional relationship. Now throw in the prospect of power misuse and the fact that Spidey was constantly unhappy….

And Deadpool's blood was suddenly boiling.

The merc whipped around to confront the CEO but was stopped short by a light shining directly in his eyes. It was getting close to dusk, and the sun had lowered enough in the sky to cause Deadpool to squint. What he did manage to see, however, made his breath catch in his throat. 

Parker was standing at _just_ the right place for the setting sun to outline his body with light. It was beautiful and captivating and looked just like a…..

_Well fuck me_.

After what felt like an eternity of staring at the other man’s silhouette, soaked in those heavenly rays from above, Wade shook himself from his daze and took in a few steadying breaths.

“Well…now I know why you declined my job offer,” he said evenly, testing the waters. “You’ve got your own company to run.”

“Yeah… _that’s_ the reason,” Peter scoffed and smiled to himself, clearly lost in his thoughts as he continued tidying up.

A few seconds lapsed before the CEO froze, finally registering what was said.

“Wait…” He looked up at the merc, eyes wide and full of panic. “No no no, that’s not what I-” Peter shook his head rapidly. “I thought you meant, like-“ 

While the younger man was busy folding in on himself, Wade took the opportunity to join him on the other side of the desk.

Seeing the stammering mess that poor Petey had become, Deadpool decided to level the playing field. Spidey also knew it was something Wade only did around people he was truly comfortable with. It was meant as a placating gesture and seemed to have the desired effect. 

Once Deadpool removed his mask to toss carelessly aside, Peter ceased his blabbering. Resigned to his fate, the brunet collapsed heavily into his chair, which rolled backwards and spun slightly from the momentum.

In one fluid motion, Wade stepped forward and turned the chair so Peter was directly facing him, immensely pleased when the action managed to draw out a small gasp from the younger man, whose gaze flickered towards the window.

The merc chuckled. “Ya know, most people try to leave through the door,” he said, nodding towards it.

Judging by Peter’s flustered reaction, the habit usually went about unnoticed. It was so subtle and wouldn’t stand out unless someone already had their suspicions, which Deadpool _very much_ did.

He leaned over the hero, completely violating his personal bubble. This closeness was nothing new to them. Honestly, if a mission didn’t include at least one moment where the two of them were pressed tightly against each other, could it even be considered a Spideypool team up? Wade’s impromptu “job interview” from a few days ago served as testament to that fact. It was also notable for being their most…compromising…position thus far. Just the memory of it had Wade sucking in a breath.

Yet there was a novelty to this situation that made it feel like completely uncharted territory. And it was all because Wade could see Spidey’s face now and the way he was blinking up at him with his big brown eyes, so timid and uncertain. 

_Cuuuute_.

He could practically see that stuffy corporate persona melting away before his very eyes, replaced with a relaxed familiarity that often settled between friends.

“It all makes sense now," Wade breathed, still working around his disbelief. "All the things you were saying about Spidey.”

“Uh…" Peter cleared his throat. "Years of practice, I guess,” he shrugged, an attempt to loosen the tightness around his shoulders. Wade stepped back to give the hero some room as he appeared to fall into some type of bit that involved reenacting past conversations.

“Do you know Spider-Man’s identity?” “Sure do.”  
“Are you guys close?” “Preeetty close.”  
“So are you and Spider-Man dating?” “NO!”

Deadpool couldn’t help but giggle at seeing the normally uptight wall-crawler so animated. So at ease in his presence as if this were one big cathartic experience for him. Hell, who was he kidding? It was for him too.

“You slippery son of a bitch. And by that, I’m referring to the _slip_ -up you made earlier!” Wade clarified cheerfully.

Peter scoffed. “In my defense, I’m like, the last person that people suspect of being a superhero. So I never have to worry about them playing dirty tricks like that.”

“Hey, all I did was ask you a question, and you decided to answer it,” Wade said innocently.

The younger man’s gaze softened. “I guess…you just have a way of getting under my skin, Deadpool."

“Please, it’s uh, Wade to you,” he coughed.

Peter blinked in surprise before a smile spread across his lips, and Deadpool didn’t ever want to look away.

The smile quickly faded, however, and he hesitated before speaking again, reluctant to ruin the lightness of the mood.

“Wade, what you said before about wanting to change…" He rubbed his upper arm consideringly. "I know that you're trying, and I already respect you for it. I should have told you that before and I'm sorry.”

Deadpool deflated. This was the moment he'd been building up to for a while now. Fantasized about long before he committed himself to this ill-advised pursuit. But somehow, despite the numerous scenarios he'd prepared for in his mind, Spidey's words still managed to completely disarm him.

Or maybe it was the sincerity and kindness in his tone or the warmth and understanding in his eyes. Or the vulnerability he displayed while acknowledging Deadpool’s own efforts to right his wrongs. Because as much as the merc appreciated Spidey for all of his...physical attributes...he'd be lying if he said he didn’t long for something beyond that…for that genuine connection born out of mutual trust and respect. And now that he had received his first glimpse of it from Spidey, he desperately wanted more.

Peter carried on, unaware of Wade’s inner turmoil. "Everything’s just been so…well, it’s _always_ been difficult, but moreso now. I can't believe I'm saying this but sometimes, I wish I _could_ quit and take you up on your offer. But I promised Anna-Maria I'd see this through." He paused before adding, "She's my coworker, by the way. She was the one who called me that time.”

“Ah," was all Wade could say. He was mostly focused on containing his excitement. Spidey actually _wanted_ to work under him (wink wink). "So why’d you create this company in the first place if it’s not what you wanted?”

Peter faltered. “It’s…It’s a long story. I’ll tell you about it later.”

“Deal,” the merc agreed.

“Yeah so…” Peter began scratching the back of his neck, “How’d you figure it out? My identity.”

“Let’s just say….I got a sign from above."

The answer earned him a raised eyebrow.

"Divine intervention?" He tried.

Peter – saint that he was – decided to leave it at that. "Well, good thing you’re not married to the queen of the damned anymore then. I doubt she’d like hearing you say such sacrilegious things.”

“Oh yeah. I’d be sleeping in the nail room tonight if she heard that talk coming from me. But think of it as a metaphor for my change of heart. I’m leaving my demon behind and running into the arms of an angel,” Deadpool said sweetly.

"Stop it, Wade.” Peter glanced away, embarrassed. 

“No, really, baby boy,” Deadpool assured, putting his weight on the arm rests and caging Peter in once more. “I said it before, and I’m saying it again. You’re special. Out of this world.” He reached out to gently brush a strand of hair out of the younger man’s face. 

This whole experience was so surreal. Details the merc chose not to see earlier were now blaringly obvious. Peter’s unruly hair, crooked tie, and wrinkled suit, as if he had just thrown his work clothes into his backpack and swung over here to change like that was all a-okay in the business world. This boy was a disaster. A beautiful, beautiful disaster.

Peter crossed his arms, giving off the same irritated, standoffish vibe that Wade was so accustomed to seeing on Spidey. Only this time, something was different. 

A blush was beginning to bloom across Peter’s face, visible even under the soft orange glow of the setting sun.

Wade found himself staring in awe. Doubly so when he was hit with a sudden and powerful revelation.

“Webs, you sneaky little sneak…”

“I think we already established that, Wade.”

“No, not _that_. Thought you could hide how you really feel about me, huh?”

“What are you talking about?” Peter asked, stiffening.

"Oh Spidey," Wade purred. "You may be able to fool me with the mask on, but there ain't no hiding your interest in me now. It's written all over your face."

The younger man's eyes grew wide before he slapped his hands to his face and hung his head in defeat. "You’re having way too much fun with this," he murmured, the words muffled against his palms.

Wade chuckled and wrapped his fingers around Spidey’s wrists, gently prying them away to drink in the sight of those deep brown eyes once more. They were so close now Wade could even see the little specks of gold in them. And immediately the situation felt so much more intimate. Something he had been denied for years was now laid out before him in stunning detail...

…but not exactly given willingly. 

The thought made his chest ache.

“Tell me I'm wrong and I'll stop, baby boy," he said, more softly now and suddenly unsure. 

Peter’s eyes darted nervously around the room as he figured out how he was going to turn Wade down, most likely. 

With each passing second, Deadpool felt his confidence wane. Finally, he drew back, afraid that he’d somehow read things all wrong. As usual. 

As he began releasing his grip, however, the brunet spoke up. “No,” he said, voice hoarse. “You're, uh…you’re not wrong.” His eyes then drifted down to Wade’s lips as if intoxicated by the sight.

A beat of silence passed, Wade's mind suspended in shock, before he surged forward with a renewed confidence to capture Peter’s mouth in his, nearly dying of happiness when the other man returned the kiss with an enthusiasm that mirrored his own. 

Without breaking the kiss, Wade maneuvered the chair, turning and pushing it until it was pressed up against the desk. This was to ensure it didn’t roll backwards when Wade leaned forward with his whole weight. 

His hands ran through those thick messy locks before sliding down to frame his neck, relishing the smoothness of that skin and making Peter sigh at the feeling of those large, warm hands on that sensitive area. Wade's hand then slipped further down to tug upwards at the man’s tie.

The brunet got the hint and rose from his chair. He eagerly obliged as Wade ushered him towards the desk, hopping up onto the furniture and straddling the merc, who then slid his hands beneath Peter's knees to pull him closer. They both let out loud moans at the sensation of Wade’s hardness pressed up against Peter’s.

"Ya know," Wade managed to say between kisses. "This reminds me a lot of that mishap with your webshooters."

Peter huffed out a laugh, which quickly dissolved into a gasp as Wade licked up his neck to nibble and suck on the shell of his ear, making the younger man grind against him more urgently. 

The idea of someone normally so composed and put-together – someone he honestly thought despised him up until a few minutes ago – coming apart at his fingertips was almost too much for Wade to handle. He felt his heart swell with want and need.

He also made no effort to suppress a groan as his hands went to smooth over Peter's pecs and abs, massaging along the undeniable muscles there. It wasn't like he needed further confirmation that this was his Spidey, but each new bit of evidence served as a mini mind-blowing experience on its own. At that thought, his hands roamed to Peter’s lower back and eventually further south to his-

_Fuck_ yeah! This was Spidey alright.

Peter exhaled sharply as Deadpool squeezed his ass. 

Spurred on by the manhandling, the brunet reached for Wade’s belt. Deadpool, however, thought better of it and pulled away, earning him a frustrated noise from the CEO.

“Sorry, Petey-pie,” he panted. "It’s almost COB, and if I didn’t stop myself, we'd both be here waaaaay past then.” 

Under normal circumstances, Peter would have scoffed. But he was a little preoccupied at the moment, focused on pulling himself together; at least enough to ensure he wasn’t an HR disaster once he stepped out that door. “Right, okay,” he agreed, also breathless as he loosened his tie. 

Deadpool’s eyes raked over the younger man’s form. “What a turn of events, eh Spidey?” He said, leaning against the desk casually, as if he hadn’t just fulfilled a longtime dream of his. “First, you act like you hate my guts, and now…well…” He gestured towards Peter’s crotch. “Way to send out mixed signals. How’s a girl ever supposed to get laid like that?”

“Um, excuse me? _I’m_ the one sending out mixed signals?!” Peter sputtered indignantly. “ _You’re_ the one who threw me for a loop earlier this week. One minute you’re hugging me from behind, whispering in my ear, giving me kissy faces, and the next, _POOF!_ You’re BAMFing us into the middle of a battle, Mr. Kidnappy-Mcgrabby hands!” He punctuated the nickname with a few firm pokes to Deadpool’s chest.

This did nothing but encourage the merc, who grabbed Peter’s hand mid-poke. “Wait wait waaaait…so back there, you thought… you thought that I was making a move on you? Is that why you were so crabby afterwards?” He was positively buzzing with excitement now. “Upset that daddy Deadpool didn’t give you the ‘d’?" 

Peter yanked his hand back as if he’d been burned. “Just forget it.”

“How can I make it up to you, baby boy? I’ve got a few ideas if you can’t think of any,” he said, switching to that suggestive voice of his.

The brunet began tugging at his collar as if the room had suddenly grown too hot, quickly becoming frustrated at the lack of give.

"God, I hate wearing business suits. They're always too tight!"

"Says the guy who wears spandex on a daily basis,” Deadpool smirked.

"Yeah well at least my movements aren't restricted in my Spidey suit. You know how many blazers I've accidentally torn from just reaching too high?"

"How 'bout you and I go somewhere more private and I tear off your blazer along with the rest of your clothes?"

The merc was rewarded with a deeper blush from the younger man, who then cleared his throat.

“Well, uh my place is pretty close by…if that’s okay with you,” he said, struggling to make eye contact, as if he had just suggested something incredibly lewd.

“Oh baby boy,” Wade breathed. “I think…I may have _actually_ died and gone to heaven.”

Peter snorted, the smile never leaving his lips as he stood up and walked around the merc to swiftly gather his things. “Close the door on your way out,” he instructed upon exiting the room.

Deadpool hung back for a minute. He clasped his hands together in front of his chest and looked upwards in an exaggerated display of gratitude. “Thank you,” he mouthed.

“What’s the hold up?” Peter called from the hallway.

“Sorry, coming!” He said cheerfully, skipping out of the room and shutting the door behind him.


End file.
